Captain of the Innuendo Squad. (brandinsbabe) wrote,
Captain of the Innuendo Squad.
brandinsbabe

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i'm no fun anymore....

things feel different today. kinda weird. its like everything is gonna work out ok, but its not. we woke up around 2 today, which was really late again. do you think we will ever get up before 12? i just feel yucky and down right now. really depressed in a way...i wanted to cut myself so bad again last night. i havent done it in a while. vito was gonna go to sleep and i just really wanted to cut myself. then he decided to watch a movie with me and sleep in my bed, so th eurge went away, but nothing has really changed.

i am supposed to call a lady for a job today. its like right in my face and everything, and i know i am probably gonna get it. but today i feel like such shit that i dont even care...whats wrong with me? why cant i just make things right...

tomorrow i'm gonna go to CBGB's to check out a band that my friend is friends with. thats gonna be a fun experience, and something to do which is always good. last night we checked out this awsome coffee house. it was a really nice atmosphere, kinda like the spot in buffalo, and they had really good smoothies and brownies and stuff. next time we go we are either gonna get the smores which you make yourself, or the fondue which they give you with strawberries, bananas, and marshmallows. it looks sooooo delicious.

anyway, i guess today we might go work out later, go to the pool and stuff. and maybe watch another movie. i just dont think i am up for much. i hate this...
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