Captain of the Innuendo Squad. (brandinsbabe) wrote,
Captain of the Innuendo Squad.

  • Mood:

wake up

it annoys me more than anything when people say certain things, but in reality they have no idea. not even close to an idea of what its like...

so we concluded that the best idea for me right now would be for me to go to a mental hospital. i am not going to go of course because i'm stupid...but i know i therapist has been telling me for years. it would be the best choice because i just can function mentally in this world. when someone cant do everyday things...simple tasks, how can they fit in into society. i literaly cant go out alone, cant get a job because i get so sick that i feel like i need to go to the er, i cant meet people, i get so depressed that i cry for hours...literally hours, ive pretty much stopped eating. and i just dont know what to do anymore. my parents dont care. they know i am going through shit and they just dont care. they give me no money...we hardly have enough for food even, no help, they critisize me and i am not even there anymore, and i am just left here alone. and then i hear things from people that just anger me so much. what i would give to be where you are...

i am so nervous about monday. i know i am gonna be depressed and tired and i will just feel so bad if i dont go. but i dont want to. i dont want to so bad. i dont want to see anyone or be with anyone. especially that crowd of people. i'm gonna cry just thinking about it...

so what do i do? just lie here and die? who would even notice i guess...

  • !!!!!


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