Captain of the Innuendo Squad. (brandinsbabe) wrote,
Captain of the Innuendo Squad.

  • Mood:

up and down

things have been so confusing lately. everything has been up and down. and so weird. vito never wants to have sex anymore (we did tonight though so that was cool) and annie wants to be my girlfriend. the weirdness ensues. vito has been up and down on his meds lately. the past few days have been ok with him. i think he is evening out. my meds seem to be working ok. the depression ones. the anxiety ones...i have to take like double the dose to be normal. my doctor just wont get it. i have an appointment with him tomorrow that i sooooooo dont want to go to. i saw my therapist today. i just cant connect with her. maybe its better that way since i am going back to buffalo soon anyway.

i love vito so much. more than anything. i cant even think of bring without him. so i try not to. the other day i woke up with a panick attack just thinking about me having to walk to a class and actually sit there with 10 other kids looking at me. i dont know what i am going to do. vito thinks its a mistake. i think its something i have to do. but as soon as he leaves i know i am gonna freak out. all i will do is cry until he comes to visit me. its gonna be horrible. so why am i doing it? i have to. i just dont know why. ugh. weirdness.

here are some pics from ladies night...thats my friend jen from high school.

bored now.

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