February 6th, 2002

Felix- to the left

hmm....

Tonight was ok actually. i was moping around my room trying everything to not do my homework, which i still havnt done by the way... and i picked up Mary's cosmo magazine which i normally never read hehe, and read a really great article about self esteem and being sexy. it was really helpful and kinda made me feel better which is always good.

so Josh stopped by after room checks (hehe i put all my candles back up) and we went downstairs to hubbies to get food and we just hung out. it was so awsome. i totally let my smile shine and the aura was great. we were really having an awsome time. he even said he felt the love hehe. it was cool. then andrea came down all upset over her wanting to be with jeff but then there is luke and all that hehe. but it was still cool. so tonight was good. i feel better tonight.

Also i got a refill of my medication today so once that starts to kick in i might be better. I believe i didnt take it for like 2 months...not smart. but my hair looked really good today and josh complimented it so yay. hehe so much for me not thinking of josh or going on and on about him. my drug....
  • Current Music
    the warmth ~incubus
Felix- to the left

these days...

Today was....fun. hehe I woke up late and missed my math class. but hey, whatever. so i woke up in time to go to abnormal psych. I look really hot today so i felt good. i also remembered that thing i read yesterday about having self confidence. and it worked again! i am so silly hehe.

so i went to class with Bob and it was fun. then after class i went to meet Josh at the wellness center. thats prtobably why i was so happy....poop. anyways we hung out there for like 2 hours just talking and checking out all the cool stuff. That place is so amazing and relaxing. Its all about the inner spirit and wellness. They had this cool massage chair there that i sat in for like so long. hehe. they also had that really cool waterfall thing. i want one so bad. also one of those little things that makes different sounds like rain, waterfall, stream, stuff like that. Josh was so into it. it was so cute =)

so tonight andrea had rehearsal till like 10 and josh has lots of work to do, so i guess i will have time to catch up with reading and stuff wince i havnt been to english in like a week. time to start going hehe... time to change my life.
  • Current Music
    where the streets have no name ~U2
Felix- to the left

"why does she love him?"

ok..just cause Josh is going to diner with someone girl and doesnt want me there, and its "kinda not a date" i wont be upset. i wont be upset. i wont be upset....

yeah, who am i kidding? you know, this day was so great and then i let him get to me. i dont want it like this ever. i was just thinking how beutiful it is outside and so great to be here. now i just dont want to be here. i want it all to go away. I want HIM to go away.
  • Current Music
    the wretched ~nine inch nails