February 19th, 2002

Felix- to the left

(no subject)

Today is Flick day. its supposed to be the best day of my life. So why is it turning out to be the worst? i dont even wanna go anymore cause i am just so upset at everything that is happening.

Andrea had the guts to get mad at me alst night cause i was like talking to John and not her , this is after she spent the entire night leaving me out of their plans fro teh entire day. i am so fed up with everything already. i just wanna leave here. i wish i could go and jump off the roof or something.

i missed my therapy today but at this point i dont care. i hope i do die cause i really dont wanna deal with this anymore. its just getting really frustrating and its starting to lack a point.
  • Current Music
    jimmy eats world
Felix- to the left

flickerriffic!!!! =)

just went down to see josh cause i was about to completely explode. everyone in teh world was being a bitch and i just couldnt take it anymore. John told me Josh was back and I just ran down before i burst into tears. He totally calmed me down though like he always does. thank god for him.

i wish i wasnt so cold to him last night. i dont even know why. maybe i was just pissed at the whole finding better friends then me thing so i took it out on him. He looked a tiny bit hurt, but he seemed totally over it today. i love him so much. how he can bring such peace in me when i cant find it at all.

So Flickerstick here i come. 5 freakin hours before the concert. how freakin rediculous is this? but atleast I get to see them. i know some people would kill for it. so i will just suck it up and deal with it. ANd then enjoy the flickermen when they come on. I get to see abandoned pools and rubyhorse too. i am excited to see rubyhorse.

I know i will miss Josh though. Maybe the fact that he wont be around tonight helped me in calming down about going to the concert. its weird what love can do...
"when you are with me, I'm free...."
  • Current Music
    my sacrafice ~creed