February 25th, 2002

Felix- to the left

...

watched interview with a vampire twice...best movie in the world.
ate diner with josh, then he said goodnight and went to go do work.
went back to my room and finished watching interview with a vampire.
andrea came by and said goodnight.
i got up and started to write a story. vampires
watched a crazy movie about melissa joan heart killing her parents and being a bitch. it was amusing.
smoked a cig, then felt lik getiing high.
wrote some more...lots more.
went to bed.
woke up numb.
no class.
its nice out but i dont want to go outside.
havnt eaten all day but i dont care.
I'm not leaving my room.
way too numb.
  • Current Music
    Dead Souls ~nine inch nails
Felix- to the left

*i dont ever want to make it stop*

i can see the disinterest so i will make it short.

i finally got out of my room at like 5. If Josh didnt call i wouldnt have gone out, and only for him would i have done so. So i ate a little salad. I have been having problems with eating again. The salad was all i had to eat since diner yesterday. ugh.

more and more of my happy friends are becoming unhappy. it makes me wonder if its not all in my head. I feel like i am slipping. Like my mind is slowely letting go. can that actually happen?

i cut myself again. that hasnt happened for a while. but i did it, and it felt good. i think i am hooked once again. just when you think it ends.
  • Current Music
    something i can never have ~nine inch nails