April 30th, 2002

Felix- to the left


I got bored yesterday so i decided to change my layout colors. thats right its pink. fuck yeah lol...weirdness

Sooooo Vito slept for a couple hours, then we went to roadhouse grill to eat cause i wanted to so bad. I love the rolls there. and the peanuts all over the floor =) After that we came back and Vito got to grading millions of papers. I fell asleep for a while, then i went to help him grade till like 7am. So by that time i was starving so we went to breakfast at the dining hall, then we went back to sleep. I am soooo tired though lol. tossing and turning doesnt really count as sleep i guess.

Anyways, now he went to class, kinda cranky..or maybe its just me, but i feel like i am in a good mood today. i want to get to some serious packing so we can leave asap. We are gonna go get my meds today and maybe my lenses, and some boxes to pack in. Then i am sure he is gonna go home =p unless he wants to watch monty python...
  • Current Mood
    groggy groggy
Felix- to the left

*if you want to, i can save you...*

so i decided to wear my leather looking pants today, i love my goth self so much more. i think i look really good and that rarely happens.

Anyway, i was just thinking about a few things. Like how its not normal to be so attached to someone that they are like a part of you, your other half, and you realize that your life is just empty and boring without them. And you realize that if it werent for them, you might be dead now, cause they caught you at a time in your life when you were just about ready to give up. And you realize how this person so completely changed your life, that you might not even be the same person you were two months ago. And then you wonder whats gonna happen. Like if its all gonna end. Cause i have hope and faith, and he has hope and faith, but there are little things that are just off. Not off enough to change anything, or be upset about even, just off.

But you know there is something there when you care more about that person then life itself, and youd do anything for them. you trust them with all youve got. youd die for them. and no i am not falling deeply and crazily into this. and its not like before. its not like ken or josh or dave or anyone else. its different this time. its genuine. its caring a responsability. And love. And i want it and i dont, and i get so confused sometimes. And sometimes i just tell myself to shut up because this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. he is the best thing that has ever happened to me. And id give him the world for that.
  • Current Music
    all you wanted ~michelle branch