January 5th, 2003

Felix- to the left

this is why i left them behind...

and this is why i hate people and dont go out to see them...

i went to meet with my high shool friends yesterday. i was soooo nervous about it. like abnormally nervous. i knew my social anxiety would kick in and i was so sick. all the way there i thought i was going to throw up. by the time i got there i could hardly feel my legs...

they turned out to be such bitches. the entire night they were jsut talking about other people and not even really talking to me or listening to anything i had to say. i forgot elise and kara were like that when they were together. plus kara brought two of her bitchy snobby friends who ruined the night. when it was time to pay the bill they handed over like 20 dollars and vito and i ended up paying the rest for them. so i told vito to confront them about it cause it wasnt fair that we payed their bill and we dont even know them. so he was shy and didnt really want to, then they started talking about how they were going to buy all this stuff so he asked them really nicely if they could give back the money they owed. they got all i his face about it and started screaming and yelling at him. they finally gave us the money. i had never seen such a display and such cheapness in my life.

then when i get home, kara, who is supposedly my best friend, ims me and gets in this whole arguement with me about it and starts insulting me and vito. so i held back as long as i could but after all she was doing was insulting me, i dished it right back. so we are no longer friends. which is actually good because i plan on ridding my life of all people like her. it made me realize how much better of i person i am, and to just trust my instincts when i see rich snobby preps who care about no one but themselves.

vito still feels bad about it. worse than i do i think. i am glad to be rid of her but he thinks its his fault. i am glad cause people like her remind me why people like me ae so much better...so i thank her for more self-confidence which i always need! :)
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