January 20th, 2005

Felix- to the left

oh these days.

i love how i am sitting at Berts and on my computer. online. raddest thing ever. just had to share.

haha now im gonna be online FOREVER ;)

and im not so paniced about my classes. last night i was having a nervoud breakdown. like a literal meltdown. tears and suicidal thoughts and everything. but after class today and getting a few ideas, maybe ill be ok. vito was so rude and not pleasant with me this morningm i thought i was gonna throw myself infront of a car, but i tried to hold back the tears and get over it and just be ok with going to class.

so today is michelles birthday. hopefully we will do something later. vito wants to go to his moms to do laundry and he is probably gonna get mad that i dont wanna go and help him. but he wants to sleep over there. and i cant do that. its just laundry. damn. < ignore it. take a deep breath >

love my wireless computer :)
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    lauryn hill. fo real
Felix- to the left

i feel like its all the same.

my sister got me a scarab beetle! with egyptian writing on the back! im so excited i have always wanted one of those! now i jsut have to figure out what it says on the back :) along with this my fam sent me a package with a beautiful green scarf, an ankle brace (hehe) some aloe ivory soap, my millenium marathon tape, some more pink hair dye (yay!) and some vitamins hehe. cool kids they are.

so today wasnt as bad. i guess. school wise anyway. my photo class went a lot better and i think i even have some ideas. so hopefully no nervouse breakdown in the near future. im looking forward to going out this weekend. then i went to meet vito for his break but he didnt want to see me so that was weird. i dunno. he never wants to see me anymore. so i just sat around and he is like why are you sitting there, and i tell him cause i have nowhere else to be and i was just gonna be with him during his break. so we went to berts and he had some food. i think we talked. i dont remember. when my heart is stabbed its hard for me to concentrate. and then he went back to class, reluctant to even hug me goodbye.

so then i saunterd over to my next class. biopsych where i met up with brianna and lisa! nice to finally meet you darling!! your so cute!! so that class was boring as hell. i was so confused. ill have to do a lot of reading there. blah. then i went to cvs and got a few thing and went to get michelles present. coming home was not a hassle at all today so that was nice.

so now i gotta watch the season finale of stargate atlantis cause i never saw it and i just found my tape! im excited abaout tomorrow. all my fav shows on one night. i might explode of dorkyness.

i cant wait till my therapy appointment next week cause im just dying over here.
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