im suddenly getting the case of the music-induced-memories. also known as csilla dwelling on the past. coldplay does this to me all the time. i love coldplay to death. but everytime i listen, there is just a stream of tears. and memories come flooding back. so rapidly and so strong. and its all so clear. like im standing right there.living it all over again. i just remember the city. walking down 70th st. going to tj;s with annie. hanging out with her at chris's apartment. sitting on my bed watching tv. and all these things make me sad. cause i think of how beautiful it was. and i know deep down maybe it wasnt. but it was something different. and it was such a part of my life. and no matter what i do i make it fade. i always think i do, but then this happend and its like my heart wants to burst. i really do miss it. all of it. i wonder about what could have been. i dont think i ever felt so much as i did then.
i cant believe i am still up at 6am.