Captain of the Innuendo Squad. (brandinsbabe) wrote,
Captain of the Innuendo Squad.
brandinsbabe

  • Mood:

nope im not dead. just rediculously busy n shit

oh, new york.

Woman in dressing room: Dear God!
Employee: Ma'am, is everything okay?
Woman, bursting from room and throwing corset at employee: Just-- Just take this far away from me!

--Victoria's Secret, Herald Square

Black guy: White guys look at women more holistically.

--Q station, Cortelyou Rd

Three-year-old girl to no one in particular: The white man is everywhere. [Mother looks at her, puzzled. Girl gazes up at crosswalk sign] The white man tells us when to go.

--86th & 2nd

Guy #1: Okay, so this news I have to tell you...
Guy #2: Yeah...
Guy #1: You're the first one I'm telling, so don't mention this to anyone yet -- I wanna be the one to break the news to everyone. It's big. And I don't want this to change anything between us or the guys -- I'm still the same James*. But it just feels right... I feel like it's time.
Guy #2, looking very uncomfortable: Uh, dude...
Guy #1: I know, you're gonna tell me I'm crazy. But I've actually been thinking about it for a long time [pulls velvet box out of jacket and opens it to reveal huge diamond ring].
Guy #2: Whoa, bro...
Guy #1: Dude... I'm gonna ask Danielle to marry me.
Guy #2: Oh, Jesus. Dude, that's awesome -- that's really great! Wonderful! I'm so happy for you!
Guy #1, accepting huge hug from guy #2: Wow, dude, you're really happy about this.
Guy #2: Bro, you have no idea what I thought you were gonna say.

--Park bench, Central Park

Ghetto girl crossing against the light, as cabbie honks: Dat's right! Dat's right! Dat's right! Hit me! I needs the fuckin' money!
Brit tourist, waiting for 'Walk' light: Oh, how charming.

--32nd & 7th


oh man, these were good. lol
Tags: funnies
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