I know i havnt updated in a while. i have been super busy takin care of stuff and just actually having a social life. stuff is getting better. I have been a lot happier the past few days. and a lot of stuff has happened. I had an amazing weekend, and an amazing monday. Today was like slow compared to teh other days! =) i feel like a different person right now. I think something inside me changed, for the better. The whole time i was saying how everything i did this weekend was so not like me, and in the end i was just happy and realized that maybe this was me, except now i just feel better about myself, and i actually feel like a person instead of just a waste of space. I am not big on details and i know amanda is waiting for it hehe, but well, the people that i feel need to know what happened, know already, and those who don't...well, dont. lol.
so tomorrow i have an abnormal psych test which i am very not looking forward to. I have been studying on and off for days, but there is so much info. I just know i am gonna be up alllllll night. By the time i actually go take the test i am gonna be so tired that i wont be able to concentrate. this always happens to me lol. I had counceling today. I think i really upset her. hehe. i felt kinda bad but it felt good to be in control. she really took it personally though, which she shouldnt, so i dunno, thats her problem. is that mean?
Last night i watched the most amazing thing on tv. I usually get really excited over once and again cause its the best show, but yesterdays episode was just exceptional. it was one of the best things on tv that i have seen in a long time. There has been a storyline lately where Jessie has been becoming really close to this girl, and yesterday teh girl told her how she felt and that she wanted to be more then friends. At first Jessie was scared because she was set in her mind that she wasnt gay, but in the end, she kissed her friend and she just said "oh my god" in the most beautiful way possible. Like she was understanding something pure for the very first time. i was so amazed at the emotion and the perfectness of that episode. It really helped me realize that being bi is a huge part of my life and that i could be comfortable with it. it was a really good feeling.
also, i think i am giving up smoking pot. people are too important in my life for me to screw it up with that.
i never thought that i would actually be happy that tomorrow is a new day and that i was gonna be a part of that day...